17 families will have empty beds, unopened Valentine Cards and dirty clothes left on the floor.
When my children were little I would make pink pancakes with strawberries and whipped cream for breakfast, complete with heart balloons and Valentine cards. As they grew older, the multiple school start times turned Valentine's Breakfast into Valentine's Dinner. The treats got smaller, the cards got shorter, and the balloons disappeared. Morning routines became blurs as they drove themselves to school before the light of the sun began to shine.
As I cut strawberries tonight for two of my teens, my heart grieves for the mother's of the teenagers who will not eat their heart-shaped pancakes tonight. A hurried teenage morning doesn't lend itself to conversation or hugs and my heart hurts for the hurried morning of mom's who didn't get that one last hug goodbye.
On a day focused on love, my heart hurts.
Why?
Why would God allow such a disaster to occur? The "why" question is a rhetorical lament in the face of an injustice that goes against the goodness of God. The "why" question is an upfront challenge - no, assault - at the sovereignty of God. The "why" question voices the counter-narrative that has just occurred that doesn't make sense with the love, justice and mercy we know to be characteristic of God.Go ahead, ask the why question! God can handle it!
In fact, asking the why question, especially in the form of a prayer is an intercessory outcry against injustice. I do not believe God orchestrates evil. This tragedy in Florida is an injustice and was not God's plan. God does not plan evil on His children. Ask why, and then let yourself grieve.
We were created for community, to rejoice when others rejoice and mourn when others mourn. As you watch the news and read about the incident at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, reflect upon each life lost. Consider the family left incomplete. Contemplate the peers who are confused, angry and scared. Allow yourself to grieve. In our postmodern, intellectual society, emotions make us uncomfortable. We'd rather suppress our feelings than admit to them - and certainly not show them! When you feel the weight of mourning, give space to grieve. This is a tragedy and we should be crying out in lament! Use your cries of why to challenge the injustice of a world gone awry.
Where?
In the middle of tragedy, remember to look for God. He is with us in our pain. He is near the brokenhearted. He promises to never leave us, nor forsake us. Where is God in the middle of this tragedy? He is present with the friends and family of the victims in Florida. His presence is made evident by the community who chooses to engage in the grief and stand with the families in mourning. We serve a God who has chosen to step into our world of pain, sit with the pain and grieve. As His representatives on this earth, let us do the same.
What?
What can I do with the pain I am feeling? Continue to cry, pray and mourn for the loss of life in Florida. If you have teenagers, bring up this injustice with them. Social media should not be the place where they are learning about their world and how to react to that world. Ask them (age appropriate) questions to engage them in conversation. Look for ways to show your love to your teens. Give them extra hugs (even when they resist!). Create an safe environment where your children and teens can come to you and ask questions about faith and life. By not talking about school shootings, we are normalizing it and leaving our children in fear of knowing how to respond. Tonight, as a family we prayed. Our teens are going to talk, the question is, who are they going to talk to?As the days pass, opportunities may arise to show our love and support for the students at Majory High - take part in these opportunities. Provide your teens with an outlet for expressing their own fear, frustration and/or pain. Through card-writing, prayer vigils and other creative expressions, showing solidarity with the pain of others brings value to human life and keeps this tragedy from being disconnected and just another 'video game' to watch from a distance.
In the meantime, hug your children.
Don't neglect to say, "I love you" as they leave for school - even in the early hours of catching buses and 0 period PE/sports practice.
Treasure everyday with no regrets.
Choose to feel pain and not to have your heart grow callous to the hurt of our world.
Be a representative of God's peace and presence wherever you go.
May we be people who live, love and grieve. May we be the hands and feet of Christ Jesus as we bring His peace and presence into hurting conversations. Let us bring the Hope of the World into situations of injustice and allow Him to bring reconciliation to a broken world.
